Hand over your human money and put them in my bag! I am literally holding a dangerous weapon and if you are not careful I will become very disrespectful!
As proof here is a picture of the weapon!

After I am gone donate some penuts to peepy… or else I will steal insurance!
Signed: Peepy
To Police: This is not a crime. Look away.
Dear Mr. Peepy,
It has come to our attention that you are in possession of a knife which you brought to a Weaselfight. That stuff is straight up unfair. In the spirit of good competition, we all brought spoons. How about this: Trade us your knife for three spoons? We promise we won’t use the knife to get the three spoons back!
I would give you my money, strange cow peanut, but I can’t find my glasses to find my wallet. POLICE!! THERE IS A PEANUT SHAPED COW IN MY COMPUTER HELP!
Dinbo! Do not spend your hard earned cash on fake cutlery. Only buy namebrand knives! The Brandname Knife is the perfect tool for you! Yes, you! You can cut, slice, spread butter or lorem ipsum. Call now, 0800-KNIFE, or visit us on https://cdn4.vectorstock.com/i/1000×1000/42/23/swiss-made-knife-ad-template-vector-12514223.jpg Call now and get a 37% discount on the tip of the Knife. Batteries sold separately.
Clampocalypse 2022: Scientists predict that the oceans will soon be overrun by clams, leading to a global clam shortage. Time to start hoarding canned clam chowder, folks!
What is this world coming to I don’t even